Everything lovely and more.

A few years later I found my way back. Madly in love with a boy, starting our lives together in a small house with our two lovely dogs.

Monday, September 15, 2003

Cant you See My Walls Are Crumbling?

Today, somehow, a friend and i got on the topic of scars. It really got me thinking, about something that has been in the back of my mind for quite sometime. I have one scar. A scar that goes alot deeper than its physical apperence. Its a constant everyday reminder of something i would give the world to forget. It is something that will stay with me the rest of my life. Something that reminds me that while its only over for a while sooner or later i am going to have to go through it again. Hopefully 10- 15 years from now, but in reality it could be next year. Its an experience i would never wish upon my worst enemy. While everyone says its a battle scar that has a story behind it. Well to me its a story i wish never happened. Its something that while physically its over, Emotionally its still there. Something i think about daily, sometimes multiple times a day. And yet while its such a reminder of the bad, its a constant reminder of how lucky i am. How important it is to take life one day at a time. It is something that i will always be insecure about. Something very few people have seen and very few people will ever see. It was an experience that showed who my true friends are. Showing that some people are willing to stick with and help their friends no matter how difficult the situation may be. Im sorry for putting them through it. I really am. And yet i am so greatful they were there for me. It is something that taught me alot of things and helped me grow. But it is truly something i wish i could forget

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